Well day one is done

Jesse and I are home now...
It's 12:20am
Jordan is with Amber at DCH
It was difficult to leave.
Jesse and I have been running on adrenalin fumes. I think our first meal today was at 4pm.
My allergies are on high, they do this in the fall, on top of that were trying to clean an rearrange our house.
We're giving them the bedroom and turning the front of the house into a studio. (granted she'll be in the hospital for a month at a time with just 5 day breaks here and there)
Trying to focus on the positives. The straight talking, informative, and caring nurse we love, was her nurse today. This is the woman that was with us when Amber first lost her hair. It was a tough day. I'm glad she was there. She was the one who taught me all about reading blood work and what being neutropenic meant. Today she was teaching all of us about leukemia.
It's a different animal. She's got a lot of it in her marrow. They checked her spinal fluid today and also put a chemotherapy drug into her spine.
My baby is an adult now 20 years old. Here we are trying to hold on to her all over again.
Jordan, her boyfriend, is so strong and sensitive all at the same time. One moment he'd be gazing into space looking like he was holding back tears, the next he's rubbing her feet, and helping her to the bathroom.
I wish I could take this all away.
I saw my Facebook on the computer today and got to see a lot of posts that for some reason don't show up on my phone. Thanks for the love. I scrolled down the page and saw posts from last week and choked on my tears. Ahhh just a week ago we had no idea...



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