So, there we were in room 1 on the 10’th floor south side of the hospital. We would get to know it as 10 South.
It was triangular, doors shut it off from halls and other clinics, it was sealed.
There were clean bald children in pajamas riding trikes and shooting nurf guns at one another smiling.
We were NOT supposed to be there. I recall feeling that so truly. This is a mistake. We are not supposed to be here. My daughter is not one of these kids. She’s fine! She has something growing, in her, eating her bone, I know, but that can totally just be some weird growth thing. It’s not Cancer! We have a bleeding disorder, I have a non malignant tumor wrapped around my eye. She is fine.
Oh these people will not remember us because tomorrow they are going to tell us that she is fine…
I wrote in my blog that night. Cancer unit? I told everyone online, were in the cancer unit. This is so surreal. It has to be wrong.
There we were though. Her sister came to the hospital and we played on the big computer in Amber’s room. Took pictures.
That night it did not sink in. Not at all. I slept, a little not much.
I still, really did not cry.
These words are too difficult to type now through my tears.
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